I am overwhelmed

Wow!
I knew you all were wonderful supportive friends and family, but this is overwhelming. I feel so truly blessed to know every single one of you.
This is a hard, heart-wrenching, anger-inducing, emotional rollercoaster of a journey and I need all of you there beside me along the way. You have no idea how amazing it feels to not have to hold back any more.
I feel like a new person. Like I don't have to pretend to be happy and ok anymore just to avoid the explanation of why I might be feeling a little down in the dumps or angry or whatever it is I'm feeling other than good.
It is a day by day thing.
Most days, I am happy as a pig in mud. I'm joyful and exuberant and live life to the fullest and feel lucky to be alive and I thank God for everything I have and the people I know and the experiences I get to have in this life. On these days I am hopeful. I am consumed by a love for God and a faith in God that makes me feel that anything is possible. Like I said, this is most days.
But, some days, I cry a lot and I am sad. On those days it's hard to see past the "I'm an infertile failure of a woman" thoughts and I drown myself in a river of tears and self-pity.
Some days I am angry. On these days I go through the whole "Why me? What did I do to deserve this?" A lot of the angry days turn into sad days, and vice versa. They sort of go hand in hand.
Even though I started this blog less than a day ago....it has been a huge help. The outpouring of support and love and prayers from friends and family has been amazing and I am so glad that I made the decision to just let it all out. I feel more understood, I feel I can just be me and people will now understand that a part of being me is dealing with this infertility thing, and that some days that is harder than others.

This blog got it's title honestly.....because here I go rambling on and on again.

Thanks for your support. I love all of you so much. I can't get through this without you.